Its Friday already..I can't believe it. The week has gone so quickly I don't know where it went. A lot happened yet it seemed also like nothing happened. I've been studying a lot and didn't get a chance to talk to as many people this time around. :(

the past two days have been thoughtfilled days...it seems as though my mind is running constantly and never stopping even though I sleep I dun feel like I've slept at all. I turn left and right to find someone to talk to ... but no one seems to care..or understand .....But though I feel like everything I do is wrong and that i can't do anything right...God gives me a light touch on the shoulder as a reminder that he is here :) Though all else on earth seems to not work....he is my rock. He reminded me that he is God. He will always BE God no matter how I feel...and we were made to worship him and our worship to him should not be dependent on how I feel because He indeed is worthy to be praised at all times despite the fact that I might not "feel" like it.

THe love of God how rich and pure,
how measureless and strong.
It shall from age to age endure,
the saint's and angel's song.

Thank you God for loving me though I in no way shape nor form deserve it. Thank you for your grace. May i always be reminded that your grace is enough for me and that it is all that i need.

random thoughts..

hmm...its so weird being home.. Its reading week and I'm home ^_^ I was soooo excited to see friends i haven't talked to in so long, visit my "kids" and...well just spend time with family and not haveta worry about exams ...well at least not having one exam after another.... and well... its only monday :) and things have been a bit different. I've been at home a lot studying and well having a lot of time to think and reflect on certain things.

"My kids" are not "kids" anymore...they're all grown up...making me realize just how much older I've gotten...walking to MJ today, it reminded me of old times when I wasn't so old and when they were much younger. And just trying to talk to some of them, things are just not the same. It makes me sad sometimes but I realize that God has a plan and that I can only treasure the past and know He's gonna do some much more for each of them in the future ^_^ :)

I think everytime I come home i have this whole sense of confusion of what is going on...and...what I hope. I think mainly cuz I feel like such a burden upon people when I'm around. And as much as I love them, I feel that my presence places more burden on them and this burden I wish not to bring on them. Comparison,, judgement...expectation these are things that bring so much barrier between people...Sorry if I've made anything more difficult for anyone..I really didn't mean to :(

Confusion about other parts of my life...not sure what to think or expect ..but...:) (this entry has been quite depressing...but) I know the Lord is in control ^_^ I'm reminded of matthew 5 and the song with the chorus

o/~ Just keep your eyes on the Lord, ask for peace to fill in your heart. Don't let your troubles burden or darken your every part. God can feed the birds in the air, clothe the lilies lively and fair. So keep your eyes on the Lord, he always cares.

He does know best and that is the hope I have ^_^ Thank you Lord that there is light at the end of the tunnel :) and that we can live in your light every day ^_^

My God loves you :) This was one of the songs that really blessed me at coffeehouse this past friday.. I know I haven't written in my blog in so long people probably don't read it anymore...but..in case you are reading..I hope the lyrics bless you just as much as they blessed me. HE LOVES US ALL!

o/~LOVE SONG

I've heard it said that a man would climb a mountain
Just to be with the one he Loves
How many times has he broken that promise
It has never been done
I've never climbed the highest mountain
But I walked the hill to Calvary

Just to be with you, I'd do anything
There's no price I would not pay
Just to be with you, I'd give anything
I would give my life away

I've heard it say that a man would swim the ocean
Just to be with the one he loves
How many times has he broken that promise
It can never be done
I've never swam the deepest ocean
But I walked upon the raging sea

I know that you don't understand
The fullness of my love
How I died upon the cross for your sins
And I know that you don't realize
How much that I gave you
But I promise, I would do it all again

Just to be with you, I've done everything
There's no price I did not pay
Just to be with you, I gave everything
Yes, I gave my life away
o/~